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Thursday, April 6, 2017

On Life, Golf Balls and Sand (published in HELLO Alanya, August 2014)

It’s been a tough month. A warm and sunny one, yes, but also a very dark one considering the news. Flight MH17 with on board 298 people (mostly Dutch) got shot down and crashed above the Ukraine on July 17, leaving no survivors. The shock and disbelieve still haven’t really passed. Watching the stories of these passengers makes you realize how fragile our lives are and how terrifying close we stand to the unknown. No matter how much we try to take control over things, it all can end in a second. And when it does, it feels like everything around us is breaking. Our hopes and plans for the future. Our sense of security. And most of all our hearts.
As we go our daily routines we can get so caught up with ‘being busy’ that we might lose sight of what really matters in life and what comes secondary. Unfortunately it usually takes a tragic events to brutally remind us of what is really important to us.
There is this story of the mayonnaise jar filled with wisdom about how we put our priorities straight. You may have heard of it before but if you haven’t I really want to share it with you so that you will be able to separate golf balls from sand when life gets overwhelming or if you feel like 24 hours in a day is not enough to get things done sometimes.
“A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and fills it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured it into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “YES”.
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.
“Now,” said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things – God, family, children, health, friends, and favorite passions. Things, that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else — the small stuff.” he said.
“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “There is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you…” he told them.
“So… pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Worship with your family. Play with your children. Take your partner out to dinner. Spend time with good friends. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the dripping tap. Take care of the golf balls first — the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled and said, “I’m glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

I’m off to France next week to visit my family and to spend lots of quality time together. They are my ‘golf balls’ after all. Hope you’ll be doing the same. Whether you are here on holiday with your friends or family or living here, enjoy your togetherness.

Love, K.

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